I suck at making decisions. So, let’s all fumble into a circle around the campfire of this blog post and eat the dot-point marshmallows of great knowledge I’ll be handing out.
Is there a decision to make?
Firstly, lets consider if there is a decision to make… This sounds so silly– there’s obviously a decision to make, but is there really a decision or are you just overcomplicating the decision you’ve already made? Sometimes, I make a decision and then keep digging for evidence and proof for why it’s the better option, rather I could just leave it be, let it unfold, and not treat it so preciously. Trust yourself.
You’re overcomplicating a decision deep down you’ve already made? No more marshmallows for you! Back into the wilderness, you’re set to go.
Em, I’m Dealing with an Ultimatum
The decision-making process can leave you feeling like a dead fish…
Here’s another marshmallow: Intuition.
It’s a strong internal life force– the whisper in your ear from the angel on your shoulder– which has been guiding you through life, up to now. But Emily;
“Intuition is stupid,”
“I’m so stressed, I feel sick in the stomach. There’s no intuition left to live here,”
“This is a serious decision I need to make with my sensible brain.”
This might seem counter-intuitive BUT switch off that logical brain for a second, actually, a few minutes. Perhaps you might like to book a weekend to go camping or get away. I go for nudie swims, hikes or do yoga. Smart decisions can’t be made between the same walls the stress is cured like a hunk of butcher’s meat. Turn off your emotions and the pros/cons running on a treadmill in your mind, just for these few minutes… Now that you’ve released and have returned to the warm, skinned organism of teeny-tiny Earth atoms, envision the two pathways. Remember, no logic reasoning here– be wildish.
Regardless of the ‘if’ and ‘maybe’ which one are you more drawn to? (Assuming you actually do this)
HINT HINT: the first pathway that came to mind…
Perhaps your answer isn’t even one of the options.
Do some research into the ‘unrealistic,’ ‘bizarre,’ ‘unacceptable,’ path you’ve chosen and plan it into possibility. I probably don’t need to say this but I will. As long as your decisions don’t harm anything other than yourself, you should be sweet! If your life is like mine and has a rigid structure– work, finances, other responsibilities– making any change can be onerous (extremely bloody difficult). Make that plan and take gradual steps to freedom… that’s what I’m doing in my life currently as of the date of this post (Sep 3rd, 2022).
And as I’ve mentioned in previous posts:
life is about sacrifice.
Stop making excuses to change, and create reasons why you deserve to be happy and liberated.
Making The Decision
Don’t fret! Feel how exciting the change will be, even if things don’t go as planned and it all ends in rubble. Every change is an opportunity for new growth and experience. Quieten the tug-of-war that may persist long after you’ve chosen: you will be happier and if not, you will be wiser.
You will be happier and if not, you will be wiser.
Train confidence! Ride the decision as far down the road as you can. Follow it until you start to align intuitively with it. If alignment doesn’t see the sun, take my next marshmallow…
I Still F*cked Up, Your Marshmallows Suck
You were so confident in your choice and it still floundered. Your instincts ‘lied’ to you. Breathe. That was meant to happen. Every change is chance to progress. Don’t dwell. Allow it to unfold– live it out and if in time, you’re miserable and so sure life sucks: make another decision. Sometimes you can undo what’s been done– life isn’t a game of Uno, it’s more a game of Stepping Stones. Choice by choice, you slowly step your way through the obstacle. When you misstep, you fall into the crocodile’s den, get eaten and have to sit out a round. Okay, you won’t suffer to those extremities! I’m saying sometimes we take the ‘wrong’ step and it causes suffering. Take a breather– sit out a round– you’ll have a turn to go again.
I recently watched this 2022 movie called Look Both Ways or if you were born in the late 1900’s, *he-hem* just before the 2000’s I mean, you’d be familiar with Sliding Doors. Essentially, it’s about the two directions one’s life could have gone if either decision had been made. In the end, both decisions were good, they just unravelled differently. So, unload the pressure of making the ‘right’ choice. There is no right or wrong, there’s just different.
There is no right or wrong, there’s just different.
Two marshmallows at once, that’s love. <3
The Ashes of this Campfire
Stress has been my biggest hinderance of making good choices. It fills my mind with useless thoughts and I get fatigued and lose all mental strength. As well as stress; I overthink; aim for the best-case-scenario; and simply DON’T CHOOSE. Anxiety bogs me down as a result.
So then I’m stressed and anxious and moving nowhere…very productive, Emily.
Take home the ashes of this campfire;
- relieve stress– massage, camp, hike, facial, painting, (comment your type of stress relief),
- don’t aim to tick all the boxes– you’ll never have best-case-scenario,
- be with yourself– stay connected and alive,
- talk to people, anyone, any input can helpful– especially if you disagree with it,
- and most importantly, remember the marshmallows!
As compensation for the lack of campfire pics, here’s a turkey for encouragement and inspiration instead…
[Name her in the comments below…]
Good luck with your decision-making!
I’m always open for a chat to listen to your thoughts. I always worry about career choices, and I’m starting to believe there is no answer for where you’re meant to be in life…everything you have is everything you need, just flow along the wild journey.
Everything will be okay.